UPDATE: The winner of the tickets to Shmoozefest is Patti Church! Congrats!

Stay tuned – at the end of this post I have a great giveaway!!!

I am extremely fortunate to be involved in many amazing projects right now. In addition to my day jobs, which allow me to work with amazing people like Mark Saunders at Saunders Farm, film director Andrew Lavigne, and the awesome staff and students at Algonquin College, I also am privileged have numerous side projects on the go with fabulous folks at United Way/Centraide Ottawa, TEDx Ottawa, OttawaTonite.com, and SAW Video Co-op.

All of the projects are distinctly different, but they all require me to be able to do one thing well – ask for stuff. It might be someone’s time, it might be goods and services, or a favour – any way you slice it, it requires the ability to ask of others and do it well.

There’s a right way and a wrong way to ask – and it can really mean the difference between getting what you want and getting doors slammed in your face. Over time, I’ve learned that asking is an art. Here are a couple of the things I’ve learned.

Visibility is key. Everyone hates cold calling. I despise it. And, I don’t find it to be very effective, either. If the person I’m asking has no clue who I am, why would they even consider what I’m asking for, when they probably have 100 other people that they actually know asking for stuff? Unless it’s the deal of a lifetime, I probably don’t have a shot.

What does it take to get on someone’s radar? Well, it takes time, for starters. And, it also takes a good balance of not trying too hard with putting yourself out there as a real person.

Social media tools are a great way to sneak onto someone’s radar. The occasional retweet, promotion of that person’s stuff on your personal blog, or a few good recommendations of that person’s work can go a long way to start to build some visibility. Here’s the key though – it has to be 100% GENUINE. I’m never, ever going to promote someone’s book just to get noticed. I am doing it because I actually believe in the author’s message. There’s a big difference between a light tap on someone’s office door and barging in. Knock lightly. Ask politely. You may have to do it a few times. But in the end, it will get you noticed in positive way, rather than a negative one.

Short, sweet, and what’s in it for me. As this blog has become more popular, I’ve started to get more and more requests for my time. I get several emails per week now asking for me to review something, or write something, or meet someone in person. I appreciate all of the people reaching out to me. How do I determine what I’m going to pursue and what goes in the trash can? It’s all in the approach.

If someone sends an email that is short, succinct, gets to the point (i.e. the “ask”) right away then I will read on. But there’s something that’s key to a good “ask”. Tell me what is in it for me, right off the bat. If I can see how what you want jives with what I want, then I’m definitely going to take notice. If what you’re asking is all about you, then there’s no value for me. We’re not a fit.

When I ask someone for something, the FIRST thing I do is figure out how to make what I want about them. It sounds counter intuitive, but if you put some thought into it, it will work. Don’t suck up. Flattery, when it’s over the top, just makes people uncomfortable. State why you’re contacting the person, in two sentences or less. Then ask. Then tell them why this is a great opportunity for THEM. I guarantee you’ll at least get a reply if you stick to that formula.

The best way to get people to listen to your ask is to be real. Be gracious. And above all, be human. Connecting with people is not about kissing up, and it’s never contrived. Never have an ulterior motive. Connect with people first because you want to. Then figure out if there’s a way your goals can jive with theirs. Then, and only then, ask.

What about you? How do you ask?

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GIVEAWAY TIME!!!

In keeping with the theme of this post – I have two tickets (thanks to Stacey Diffin-Lafleu) to give away to the United Way’s Shmoozefest 2009 on October 21st. It’s a great event with all kinds of opportunities to connect with amazing people in the Ottawa business community. If you want to be entered to win, simply reply in the comments with “I wanna go to Shmoozefest, Suze!” and I’ll enter you in the draw. I’ll draw the winner on October 15th. Good luck!

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I’m heading downtown this morning to spend the day with the wonderful gang at SAW Video Co-op. I’m on the Board of Directors there, and today is what’s known as a “Visioning Retreat”…which is really just a fancied up term for creative planning, I think.

I don’t know exactly what to expect, but I’ve been to lots of these kinds of sessions before. I find them to be quite a bit of fun, when done well. I have no doubt that this session will be great – these guys are a class act.

Before I head out, I wanted to jot down a few ideas on creativity. Creativity is something that lots of people get apprehensive about. “I can only be creative when I have complete silence.” “If I’m not feeling it, it won’t happen.” “Most other people are far more creative than I.”

We have lots of excuses for our lack of creative energy. I make them all the time. Someone once told me that procrastination is a direct result of not having enough information. If you don’t know, you can’t do. Kinda makes sense, eh? So how do we get over the hurdle and get into a creative mindset? Here’s a few things I’m trying.

Clean the closet. It’s next to impossible to have a creative thought if you’re busy worrying about everything else you need to do. But don’t sit there saying to yourself “I’ll work on my creative thing as soon as I get X and Y done,” because you’ll never get to Z, I promise. The best way I’ve found to get things out of my head is to get them onto a list. Get a clean sheet of paper and a pen (Yes. Low tech here, people!). Write down everything you need to do. EVERYTHING. Once you’ve got your list, put it away. There. Now you have a blank slate. Create!

Have lots of dumb ideas. Seriously. I have dumb ideas all the time. Ridiculous, even. I know it’s dumb as soon as I think of it. But I make note of it anyway. (Tech tip – I am a fan of Evernote for this, because I can jot it down from any computer, handheld device, etc. and it’s all synced up all the time). Because what might be a dumb idea today could be a brilliant move in 6 months. That’s happened to me a lot. Come up with lots of dumb ideas, because for all the dumb ones, you’re going to get some real gems.

Many hands make light work. It’s true, there are some things in life that are just better when you do them with someone else. (No, I’m not talking about that. But think what you want.) It’s fine to be a creative loner sometimes. Writing this blog is my independent creative outlet (though I get lots of inspiration from you all). But really, I can’t think of anything I like more than sitting in a room full of creative minds, shouting out ideas, playing off one another, and making something brilliant. It’s a wonderful feeling, to be supercharged with all the creative energy that a group can have. If you need to get fired up creatively, grab some friends or colleagues, lock yourself in a room for a few hours and see where you end up. It works.

Well it’s about time for me to head out. I’m excited for today, and for all the new ideas and creative moments we’ll have. I’ll leave the rest up to you, okay? If you have thoughts to share on how you spark your creative energy, share them with us in the comments.

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There’s an unusual trend happening in my life right now, in terms of how I’m connecting with people. I’m doing a lot of “offline” stuff. Perhaps it’s just the nature of my schedule of late, perhaps it’s intentional, perhaps it’s fate…but I am finding some great richness in the interactions I’m having with the non-geeks in my life.

For instance, thanks to my offline friend Ray, I am now on the Board of Directors of a fantastic local organization called SAW Video Co-op. SAW is a place where local video artists have access to resources, training and equipment to produce their own independent videos. It’s a super vibrant community. Yes, you can draw some parallels between video geeks (of which I am one) and Internet geeks (of which I am also one), but essentially this is an offline experience for me. I’m participating in in-person meetings. The events I’ll be attending are happening in a self-contained way – people are physically present, unlike a Tweetathon, a webinar, or a Twestival. Some might argue that an organization like SAW could benefit from some of these online experiences, but that’s another post altogether.

Another example of connecting in the offline world occurred last night at my Dad’s 71st birthday party. Other than the fact that my Mom sent an email to us kids to inform us of the time and date of the gathering, the event took place offline. My brother and SIL, my two nephews were there. So were my parents’ close friends, who we consider our aunts and uncles. Everyone was talking all at the same time. We ate birthday pie, and cheescake, and drank vanilla coffee. The kids ran around. I built a Lego house out of the same Lego set we had when I was a kid. My Dad told stories. My Mom giggled in the kitchen with my aunts. We were all there, and present.

We spend so much time cultivating our online relationships that sometimes we forget that there is a whole world out there that is not so dependent on connectivity. My parents, and aunts and uncles, though they sometimes use the Internet, don’t RELY on it for their daily interactions. They still pick up the phone. They even mail letters and cards and stuff once in a while. They spend time together, in the same physical space, if they want to connect with friends.

Connecting with others online over the past few years has been a life altering event for me. I’ve become close friends with people I’d have otherwise never met. I’ve gotten phenomenal new business opportunities. My life has definitely been enriched by my experience, and the Web will undoubtedly continue to play a major role in my life.

However, I am really beginning to appreciate my offline life a lot more. It operates at a much slower pace. It doesn’t require the same kind of immediacy, because people are just more relaxed when they are facing each other. Nothing is left to the imagination when you can see someone’s body language and facial expressions. You get the whole conversation, because you are seeing, and listening, and touching, and ultimately understanding a lot more.

I’m not just talking about moving your online world to your offline. We are being conferenced to death right now – there’s all of these events we can go to where we can meet each other in the flesh. That works well for some, and it’s fine. But look around you. Remember those people you knew before the Internet? They are still there. Pick up the phone. Go knock on their door. Have that experience too.

And, if you are still unsure about the power of connecting in the physical world, watch Matt. Now that’s how you bring people together.

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