Last night I got to hang out with my family for a little pre-Christmas celebration. It was my brother’s Mother-in-law’s 80th birthday party. It was pretty important for me to be there, not only to help Pauline, a sweet and charming lady, celebrate this milestone day, but also because this is the first year that I won’t be spending Christmas Day with my immediate family. This was my last chance to see them all before I head out West tomorrow morning. Oh, I’ll still be having a great time, but I’ll be with my other family this year (hubby’s parents and sisters).

We all headed out for dinner at my co-Aunt’s stunning country home out in Carleton Place (a 25 minute trek from Ottawa). I call her my co-Aunt, because we are the only Aunts to my two little nephews (and we’re both named Sue). It was a crazy, noisy, chaotic, chatty, loud, laughing, boisterous evening, as most of our family events tend to be. Everyone was talking at the same time, the kids were running around using the whole big old house as a jungle gym, Dad was giving haircuts to the men (that’s a story for another time!), and we were all feeling thankful and fortunate that we could be together on this cold wintry night, with the food and the wine and the happy times. We were sharing and connecting and communicating. But want to know the craziest thing of all?

Not one person was online.

We spend a lot of time out here on the Internet trying to figure out what all this social media stuff means, and it’s possible that the answer is right in front of us and we just can’t see it. The problem is, we get so wrapped up in the tools and techniques and etiquette that we can no longer see the forest for the trees.

The truth is, social media is nothing more than an extension of that which we already know. In other words, everyone has the ability to be successful with social media. Why? Because we do it everyday, only in an offline sort of way. We do it when we go to work and interact with our colleagues and customers. We do it when we call an old friend on the phone just to say hi. We do it when we get together to celebrate with our families.

It’s called “social” media for a reason. It’s not called “keep to yourself and sit in the corner not talking to anyone” media. It’s called social media because it’s social. And we, as human beings, are inherently social animals. It stands to reason then, that communicating and sharing and connecting would be second nature to us, no?

When people who aren’t involved in social media look at it, they see a plethora of tools and an abundance of content and it’s completely overwhelming to them as to how they are going to decipher it all. But it’s kind of like the family dinner. The signal to noise ratio at the average family dinner is very high, as is the signal to noise ratio out here on the Web. At a family dinner, it’s mostly noise. But the signal is there, you just have to listen for it. And in the end, amidst all the chaos, there’s the calm of knowing that just by being there, listening, and contributing, you are valued.

As you gather around the holiday table with your families this year, consider this – we are all social beings. What we’re doing out here on the Web is merely an extension of what we are all already completely capable of. It’s just bigger now. The dinner table has a lot more chairs around it.

Happy Holidays!

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This is the first Christmas in 38 years that I’ll be away from my family. It’s kind of a weird thing, and I find myself feeling a little bit emotional about it. I am still going to be around family – hubby and I are going to Winnipeg to spend Christmas with his family. But the fact that I won’t be spending Christmas morning with my parents, and having dinner with them and my brother and his family, does change things up a bit for me. With this big change, I’ve decided to take this opportunity make some changes in the way I celebrate Christmas.

Less Stuff. I love giving people presents. However, I have always found the process of Christmas shopping to be quite stressful. I hate malls. I hate big box stores. I find other shoppers to be exceptionally rude in a lot of cases, which is ironic, given that we’re supposed to be all peace, love and happiness this time of year. I hate the fact that we are so consumed with the “stuff” of Christmas. Everyone is rushing around, spending all kinds of money they don’t have, because they feel some sense of obligation to be the one to get the biggest, best stuff. It makes me not want to bother with Christmas at all.

This year, I’m changing my tactic. First, I’m only going to buy targeted, specific gifts for people. Instead of buying each person 3 to 5 things that they won’t even remember in 3 weeks’ time, I’m going to get each person one, maybe two things that are really special, that I know they will enjoy. Second, I’m doing the bulk of my shopping online. This allows me to do two things – I don’t have to go to a mall and end up hostile and grumpy. I also find I am more strategic in my spending when I do it online. With these simple changes, I can take pleasure in giving again. This way, it’s not about the amount of stuff people are getting. It’s about the process of giving.

Enjoy the Simple Things. In fact, we are not going to be in Winnipeg proper for the holidays – we’re going to be in a town about an hour outside the city, with a population of 965. Yup. 965 people. My in-laws don’t have the Internet (gasp.) I am reasonably sure there is no Internet cafe or free wifi to be found in the town. What does this mean for me? No blogs. No Twitter. No Facebook, LinkedIn, or Instant Messaging. Oh, and did I mention no Twitter?

This too, is an opportunity. Between work and play time, I probably spend upwards of 7-9 hours online every day. Without the Internet as an option, I know already what I’m going to do. I’m going to relax. Read some books. Do some personal writing (like, in an actual notebook, with a pen). Listen to music. Sit with a cup of hot tea and stare out at the cold, windy Manitoba terrain and be thankful for the blessed life I have.

It’s Not Just One Day. Christmas is December 25th, but really, it’s just a day. As soon as I start to get a bit sniffly about the fact that I’m not going to spend that day with my parents and brother this year, I remember that we get to have two Christmases this year. When hubby and I get back from Winnipeg we will be having Christmas with my family. Just like always, except it will be a different day. I’ll still get to see my nephews’ excited faces when they open their gifts. I’ll still get to hug and kiss everyone and smile and feel good to be around them.

I feel as if the world has gotten so caught up in the commercialism of Christmas that we’ve really forgotten what this time of year is supposed to be about. It’s about taking a pause from our hectic lives, slowing down for a while and getting centred again on what is most important…our family and friends. It’s about reflecting on the year that’s been and what we have to look forward to in 2009. It’s about hope, and happy thoughts, and enjoying your life.

How are you planning to spend the holidays? What is most important to you this time of year? I’d love to hear your stories in the comments.

Photo by Across and Down on Flickr.

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