Community. It’s become the buzzword of the 21st century, hasn’t it? I find that these days, people use it haphazardly. It’s thrown into PowerPoint decks to give a “cutting edge” impression, and tossed about in Twitter streams because all the cool kids are doing it. It’s become the theme of many a social media conference, and all the so-called experts are now experts at “community” too.

Unfortunately, anytime a word becomes a buzzword, its true meaning becomes diluted. Which is why events like the one I attended last night are so important.

I was privileged to be invited to attend the United Way Community Builder of the Year Awards Gala along with a gaggle of other local bloggers, including Andrea Tomkins, Bob LeDrew, and Marc Gagnon. Andrea and I were quite a sight at the MBNA table (thanks for being so accepting, folks!), juggling our iPhones, cameras, and notepads. Bob had a multitude of recording devices strung over his shoulder as well. We were on a mission to make media in any way, shape or form we could. You can follow our Tweetstream by searching on the hashtag #cba.

But the evening was about so much more than live tweeting and videoblogging. It was a celebration of some of Ottawa’s most upstanding citizens. It was truly about celebrating the spirit of community. Not the buzzwordy, false sense of “community” that is so easily misinterpreted in the online world – but real people, who not only genuinely care so much about making the world a better place, but are actually doing something about it.

Here are just a few of the highlights of the evening:

The Community Builder of the Year award was presented to Ottawa’s Police Chief, Vern White. Here is a man who, on a daily basis, is effecting positive change on our city. Chief White is not just sitting behind a desk. He’s out there, working hard to get drugs and kids off the streets. He’s deeply involved with the citizens of this great city, every single day. He’s making important and sometimes difficult decisions, and working with our city leaders to implement those decisions in a timely fashion. “I’m overwhelmed and honoured to be standing here,” he said. “Every day I pinch myself that I get to do this for a living. I’d do it for free.” And who wouldn’t? He’s changing the world, one street corner at a time.

What can I say about Max Keeping that hasn’t already been said? For those of you not from Ottawa, Max is an institution in our city. He was the anchor of the 6pm news on CTV Ottawa for 38 years. He is a Member of the Order of Canada and has countless other honours. He is a cancer survivor. He has done more for this city in 40 years than 100 people do in their entire lifetimes. He has passion and caring for people beyond belief. Max was the recipient of the Community Builder of the Year award in 2004. Earlier this year, when a devastating fire wiped out the CTV Ottawa newsroom, that award, along with most of Max’s other memories from his 38 years at the station, was lost. I don’t think there was a dry eye in the place last night, when Max was surprised with the presentation of a replacement of his 2004 Community Builder Award. But what touched me even more was his response. “These awards are not about us,” he said. “We represent everyone that does so much to create this community that we cherish.” Cheers, Max. May you have another 40 years of helping to make our community great.

As the evening went on, we heard stories of amazing workplace campaigns, as government departments like Human Resources and Skills Development Canada and Health Canada were honoured. We learned what great companies like PCL Constructors are doing to raise money and awareness. We listened as 19 year old Nathalie Gervais talked about how she turned her life around – from being a drug addict and prostitute at the age of 13 to now inspiring young people across the country to embrace their unlimited potential. “The secret to recovery for me,” Nathalie said, “was finding a passion and just going for it!”.

At the end of the evening, United Way President Michael Allen revealed new Pillars of Engagement for the organization, along with a new look and poster campaign. “Give | Speak up | Take Action” position United Way in a new light. Their goal is to no longer be perceived as just a money-maker, but as an organization who is taking action to make our community, and ultimately the world, a better place. (Incidentally, no donor dollars are used to put on the Community Builder Awards Gala. The event is 100% funded by corporate sponsorship).

Those Pillars are just words though, until there is action put behind them. Fortunately, I saw first hand last evening that there are people in this city who are already putting these words to work. They are the pillars of our community. They bring the true meaning back to the word. And their efforts make me proud to be a part of this great city, and compel me to want to do more.

It’s time to take back the word “community”. To give it the meaning that’s intended. To show “community” the respect it deserves.

You with me?

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I am not fond of the term “In Real Life (IRL)”.

As far as I’m concerned, everything I do is my real life. Some people that I consider good friends are people I’ve never met in person – amazing people like Becky McCray, Jason Falls, Jason’s Dad Chillie, Deb Brown – aw, heck, I could go on for a week. I’ve only met my friend Jon Swanson in person once, last year, for about an hour, at lunch. Before our short meeting, I called him, as we were about to pass through his town. I realized until that moment when he picked up the phone, that I’d never actually talked to him before. Our entire year long friendship, until that second, had happened through written text alone.

These people are my friends. I’ve grown to care about them deeply over the past few years, as much as I care about people that are in my physical space every day. I think they might be a bit put out if I thought that they weren’t part of my “real life”.

So, maybe I can make a deal with you…how’s about we stop using “in real life” to describe our offline relationships? It’s not respectful of our online friends. Cool?

That said, this post is really more about the offline world, as opposed to the online one. Call it my feeble attempt at being ironic.

Where everybody knows your name. Every Friday afternoon, a whole gaggle of geeks converge on a pub downtown for what is affectionately known as #FridayOffice* (go ahead, search the hashtag on Twitter – you’ll see.). It was started by my friend Tom (@wtl), who is a home-based working type of guy, as a way for him to get out of the “office” for an afternoon, have some lunch, and possibly get caught up on a few things. Tom is the fixture of the event, he takes up residence mid-morning and stays around the whole afternoon. Other people drop in and out, grabbing some lunch, maybe a beer, and often hauling out their laptops for a while too. It’s evolved from one guy getting a change of scenery to a weekly tradition.

But #FridayOffice is about much more than beer and lunch. It’s not really that much about work. What it’s really about is community. We go there to get a break from our busy weeks, to socialize, and to connect. Oh sure, lots of us spend time together online during the week…often we’re all floating in each others’ Twitter streams and Facebook walls. We’re reading and commenting on each others’ blogs, and sometimes we’re even working together on projects. But the in-person meet up is a different dynamic altogether. Why? Because it’s real-time. I mean REAL real-time. We get to talk, laugh (and boy, do we laugh!), collaborate, and learn. There’s lots of energy in play, so it’s a place where we can openly discuss issues, come up with ideas, and check in with how people are REALLY doing. Every time I go to #FridayOffice, I come away with something I didn’t have before. I get a lot out of those couple of hours every week. Others do too – that’s why we keep showing up.

Reach out and touch someone. As much as I love connecting to people online, my goal is always, someday, to meet my online friends and colleagues in-person. Why? Because once I’ve had the experience of being in the same room as someone, somehow, our relationship changes a bit. I mean, it’s okay if I don’t get to meet you in person. It doesn’t mean we’re friends any less. But every single time, without fail, that I’ve met one of my online friends in person, I get a whole new perspective on them. They say something like 80% of communication is non-verbal. That means, if I’ve never talked to you face to face, I only sort of know you 20% (and likewise, you only know me that much). Now, it turns out that’s a pretty important 20%, right? After all, I’ve got whole friendships based on that 20%. But once we’ve met, shaken hands (or, more likely hugged, ‘cuz I’m a hugger), and have had some time to SEE how each other is – the way our voices sound, our mannerisms, facial expressions, how we tilt our head to the side or that nervous leg twitch – we get the rest of the story. Instantly, our relationship goes to a different level. We get the full picture of each other.

Meeting in person certainly does NOT discount the friendship we’ve built to that point. But it does add a new layer, and an important one. In person is the reason why the geek community here in Ottawa is so tight knit. We make a point of having meet-ups, and tweet-ups, and going to Third Tuesdays and Social Media Breakfasts and #FridayOffice. We know that our online interactions are critical to making connections, building our friendships and finding new opportunities to do business together. But like my friend Eden (whom I HAVE met in person) says – face to face trumps online, every time.

So…it pays to get out from behind the computer screen once in a while. For as much as your real life can exist here on the Web, the “rest of your life” exists out there.

What are you waiting for?

– #FridayOffice is a registered trademark (well, sort of) of What The Lemur?

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Cheryl and I have been friends for 20 years. We met way back when we were practically kids – just out of college, wide eyed and hopeful about what our careers is TV would hold for us.

She was a video editor, and volunteered on Soundtrack, the music show I produced. We were fast friends…mostly because we clicked, but partly because you can’t help but become close to anyone with whom you spend 15 hours a day in an edit suite.

One of the things I love about my friend is she lives, breathes and eats passion. She dives in head first to anything she believes in, and just makes things happen. While the rest of us are sitting around contemplating next moves, she’s making phone calls, sending emails and getting people engaged and excited.

Last Spring, we were sitting at the bar at Chez Lucien, a great little burger joint in downtown Ottawa. We’d just polished off delightful plates of carnivorous goodness, it was about 9:30pm, and Cheryl asked me, “So who’s playing tonight?” It was a common question for us – if there’s one thing me and Cheryl LOVE to do it’s see live bands.

We grabbed our respective mobile devices – she on a web-enabled cell phone, me on a iPhone – and proceeded to look up the local music listings for our town. 20 minutes later, we were shaking our heads, glaring at our devices, both of which had yielded no common source to find out what bands were playing. We eventually gave up and just went back to her place for a glass of wine. It was over that glass of wine that Cheryl said thoughtfully, “If there is no online source for Ottawa Arts and Entertainment, then why don’t we start one?”

In that moment, Ottawa Tonite was born.

Sometimes, ideas like that happen, but then they quickly get overridden by normal life stuff – jobs, kids, and other commitments and suddenly you’re thinking, “It’s too bad we never got that site off the ground..” But this is Cheryl we’re dealing with here – so of course that wasn’t going to be the case!

A few days later, Cheryl called me to inform me she’d purchased the domain name ottawatonite.com, that she’d been talking to some of her musician and theatre friends, and they’d be interested in contributing to the site. Wow – in three days, we had a home for the site, and we had people who wanted to sign up to help out? Well alrighty then.

Within a few weeks, Cheryl had contacted just about everyone she knew in the Ottawa arts and entertainment scene, and had nothing short of 15 people ready to provide written, video and audio content. In fact, some of them were already out there gathering stuff, and were willing to post it on the site, for free!

We had content, but sadly, we had no actual site yet! If there’s anything that social media has done for myself and Cheryl it’s put in front of us dozens of talented graphic designers and developers. We were able to use our networks to find the right people for the job, and in spite of a few (normal) hiccups along the way, a few short months later, we had a functioning web page and content to make it work! Yesterday, we launched ottawatonite.com, Ottawa’s online source for arts and entertainment!

Community Building 101. Many people think that in order to build a community web site you have to get the actual site up and running first, then worry about filling it with content. Ottawa Tonite is a VERY ambitious project – we aspire to be the pre-eminent source for what’s happening in the theatre, music, literary, film, comedy, and food and drink scenes in our city. That means we have to be totally tapped in to all of these areas – and we definitely can’t do that alone. After all, this is a volunteer effort – we do have full time jobs and families and things and there simply aren’t enough hours in the day for us to be running around to every event in town.

Step #1 in building an online community is always, always, always people. Months before we even had one piece of design or code on the page, Cheryl was running around town talking to everyone she could about the site, and getting artists and behind-the-scenes people on board to be contributors. And she didn’t just stop with a “sure, I’ll contribute!”. She got them to start gathering stuff. People were capturing video, writing blog posts, and creating audio recordings months ago. Cheryl set the expectation with them – the site was a few months out – but it didn’t matter – people were fired up and ready to hit the ground running.

80% of the work on this project was done months before any code was placed on the site. Thanks to those efforts early on, we now have a wonderful community, and the site is up and running and jam-packed with great content. The community is vibrant, and most importantly, it’s sustainable. No one person has too much on their plate. Everyone is working with their own talents. Cheryl has provided the vehicle – the artists are providing the voice.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again – it’s not about the tools. It’s not about the tools. It’s about people. Cheryl saw a need in her community in an area she was passionate about. She went out and got other people to be passionate about her idea. And it worked.

Check out Ottawa Tonite when you get a chance – we’d love to hear what you think. And if you have thoughts, suggestions, or are interested in being a contributor or an advertiser, give us a shout at info [at] ottawatonite.com.

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Last night, I got a message from Keith Burtis. Keith often pings me just to say hi or chat. We sometimes talk on Skype. He’s a person I know I can turn to to celebrate my successes, and who I can lean on when things go bad. We’ve collaborated on a bunch of things to do with work. I consider him a very good friend.

Alan Isfan is another good friend of mine. We catch up a couple of times a week, have collaborated on some work stuff, and he’s that guy I know I can rely on 100%  to help me out in a pinch, whether it’s a work-related challenge or if I am stuck on the side of the road in a blizzard.

I am grateful every day to have such terrific and talented people around me. But what I find fascinating is, even though we have these strong, solid personal relationships, and even though we have built a tremendous amount of trust with one another, we are actually each others’ competition.

You see, Alan, and Keith and I are all in the same business. We use new media, social media and video to help our clients tell stories. Ultimately, we are all drawing from the same well. How is it that we’re not mortal enemies, then?

You must remember this. Think about 10-15 years ago. Competitors were something to be stifled, pushed down, tromped on. If a businessperson didn’t know who their competitors were and how to beat them, they simply weren’t doing it right. It was a wicked game, but one that many played hard. Sometimes, they’d even go so far as to befriend the competition, but their intent was often devious. They  just wanted to find out how their competitors ticked. What was tripping them up. So they could swoop in and scoop the business. Now before you jump all over me, it wasn’t ALWAYS like this. That’s where the phrase “If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em!”, came from. I worked for giant corporations for many years; if they couldn’t compete, they just tried for a monopoly. Yah, that’ll show ‘em.

Play it again, Sam. Oh sure, fierce competition still goes on today on many levels. Giant corporations certainly haven’t changed THAT much. But I do sense a shift in the small to medium business world, and I wonder if it has to do with the shift in the way we communicate and connect with one another. Think about it – how many people do you know in your social networks that you consider someone you trust? Someone you’d like to do business with? Collaborate with? Partner with? Now how many of those people are your direct competitors?

It’s all about US. If you’re anything like me, you’ll answer the above questions with things like “Oh, so many of the people I know online I’d love to work with!”,  “I trust that person immensely!”, and “I’d do anything I can to help that person!”. Times have changed indeed. That’s the thing about community. Instead of us feeling that we’re all working against each other, pushing and shoving our way into the pockets of those people who need our products and services, we’re all helping each other to succeed. Somehow, we realize that there’s enough to go around. Somehow, we realize that even though we are all trying to do similar things, we’ve all got our own strengths and weaknesses. We know that the sum of the parts makes a stronger whole out here in the online world.

But…There is a flip side to this philosophy – a down side, if you will. Whereas competition and community can co-exist happily much of the time, trust itself can be fickle. One false move and you may find yourself having to build up all over again. I’ve learned some lessons in the past few months about trusting too much. I think it’s absolutely wonderful that I have these great friends like Keith and Allan who I love to hang out with and talk to and work with, but it’s taken time for us to build that. Just because someone wants to be your “friend” doesn’t mean you should dive in with both feet and reveal everything right away, especially if that person is potentially a competitor. It is easy to trust people quickly on things like Twitter. It’s easy to take someone’s recommendation and put your trust in another right away without doing the proper checks and balances to see if that person’s reputation stands up. And as a result, it’s easier than ever to get burned. So should you close down? Not at all. But do keep your guard up, until people prove themselves…and I mean with real stuff, not just words.

So I guess what I’m trying to say is…This post stems from a bunch of stuff that has been swimming around in my head lately. It comes from a situation with Keith and Allan last night where we were able to work together to create something that I hope helps Keith out in a big way. It comes from the fact that I’m completely engrossed in Chris and Julien’s book Trust Agents right now (click that big book up on the right side there, so you can buy oh, I dunno, 1 or 50 or 100 or 1000 copies, ok?). I’m totally biased; I’m not making any secret about that. But honestly it’s been a while since a business book has had me thinking so much. To the point of distraction sometimes. It’s definitely wrapping my head around some things that I’ve been noodling with for a while.

What it comes down to is, somehow, this space that we’re sharing out here has made us aware, in no uncertain terms, of who our competition is. As businesspeople, that’s a good thing. But it’s also made us realize that we’re all just people, trying to succeed, trying to live our passions and dreams. It’s becoming clearer that if we’re in this together, we might as well work together, instead of pushing against each other. Because if we’re all moving in the same direction, ultimately, our clients will be better off. Their stories will be richer. And hey, I guess we will be too.

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This morning I sat down over tea and cookies with two of the most interesting, creative and smart people I know. We’ve all been friends for years and years – since I was just a wide-eyed kid embarking on my first real TV job.

My friend’s basement office was like some sort of secret lair, a place where you just know big plans are being made. We huddled over our shortbread. A large painting of our host was oddly juxtaposed behind him. The striking likeness watched over our conversation with interest, as the real man sat in front. It was at once surreal and familiar. We sat, sipping, and mulled over our own big plans. The whole experience set me on the following stream of thoughts for the rest of the day.

One of the reasons why I am so interested and engaged with social media is because it revolves around the central theme of community. Whether you are building social media strategies for multimillion dollar companies, or creating a personal blog about your passion, you are striving to achieve the same thing – to build a strong, thriving community around something people care about.

It baffles me that so many people look at community as being some kind of bold new concept, especially in conversations around social media. They talk about community building, community management, community awareness…as if it’s the next big thing, the next new wave. They totally over complicate the process, and the entire point  of community gets lost in translation. I’m as guilty as the next person of getting caught up in the fad of community – especially as it relates to the online world.

Community isn’t new. Community has been around as long as we have. Communities are not created by tools or technology…they are created by people. My two friends helped me to remember this today.

One of my friends is working on building a new community. My other friend (the guy with the secret lair) has been building communities for years. Both of them are really really good at it. They’ve got it cased. Not only do they know how to build a community, they know how to make it strong. It doesn’t matter what kinds of communities they are building. What matters is that they aren’t getting caught up in the process or the buzzwords or the tools. They are just doing it. Want their secret? Well, okay then.

1. Surround yourself with smart, passionate people. Then, you never have to worry that there won’t be anyone around to help.
2. Just because someone has different tastes, doesn’t mean they don’t belong in your community. Give everyone a chance to try it out. A strong community is a diverse community.
3. Strong communities have great leaders. Great leaders have strong communities.
4. A community doesn’t take work. It takes passionate people who care about making it work.

Sometimes I think we get so caught up in the technology and the next big thing, that we forget that really it comes down to people. It’s not hard to build a community. What’s hard is putting aside the gizmos for a bit and focusing on what kind of community you want to build. And then, just getting out there and building the darn thing.

Thanks, two friends!

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Back in December I wrote a post on The Art of Saying No. It was in response to an overwhelming number of demands and requests I’d been receiving for me to help with this, retweet that, and come to this event, and so on. It helped me set my mind straight on how to make sure I wasn’t overdoing things.

While it is true that being able to say “no” in the right way, to the right things is an art, there’s most definitely a flip side. That, of course, is saying “yes”.

Yesterday I listened to a fantastic interview on CBC Radio 1′s show Q with The Honourable Pamela Wallin, broadcaster extraordinaire turned foreign diplomat turned Canadian Senator.

For those of you who don’t know her, Ms. Wallin is one of our most famous Canadians. She spent much of her career as one of the most prolific journalists and anchorwomen in the country. Following the September 11th terrorist attacks, Ms. Wallin helped to coordinate rallies and events in support of the people of New York City and thus began her foray into diplomatic relations. Prime Minister Chretien appointed her consul general to the U.S in 2002. She’s a recipient of the Order of Canada, and a cancer survivor. A couple of months ago, Prime Minister Harper appointed her to the Senate of Canada.

How’s that for a few life accomplishments?

On the Q show the other day, Ms. Wallin was asked by interviewer Jian Gnomeshi what she felt was the secret to her success. I loved her response. She said, “I say ‘yes’ a lot.”

As much as I advocate balance when it comes to saying “yes” or “no”, there’s a lot to be said for being a “yes” person. Why? Because you never know what opportunities will unfold by saying that one simple word – yes.

I get asked to do a lot of things in the course of a week. I offer to do a lot of things too. My rule of thumb is, “If it feels like the right thing to do, then do it.” It might be saying “yes” to someone who’s asking me for help. It might be me, offering my assistance to someone (either professionally or personally). The way I see it, if I don’t take that step, nobody’s going to take it for me.

This doesn’t mean you have to say yes to everyone that comes your way and asks for help. Sometimes, delegating is handy for that. Sometimes, what’s being asked of you simply doesn’t fit your schedule or your core values. But more often than not, taking that simple step of “yes” can open doors you never thought possible.

If you are going to work on being more of a “yes” person, there are a few critical elements you must abide by. First, it’s vitally important not to over commit yourself. Look at the plan you have laid out in front of you. Do you have the time/money to really give your all to what’s being asked of you? If you don’t, you may have to reconsider the extent of your “yes”. Why? Because of vitally important thing number two. Do not ever say yes, and then back out. The damage that can do will ripple through in more ways than you can imagine.

In the end, it’s really about one simple thing, something that’s been true in my life in unimaginable ways. The more you give away, the more you get back.

Yesterday, Gary Vaynerchuk posted something on Twitter that resonated with me. He said (and I’m paraphrasing) “6 times a day, people ask me how they’ll know when they’ve ‘made it.’” He posted a link to a video blog he did back in June 2008 on “When do you know you have a community?“. In it, he noses right up to the camera and says, in no uncertain terms (and this is why I love Gary), “You have a community when ONE person listens to you!!”.

While that is very true, I would say there’s another aspect to what defines one as truly having “made it”.

Some would say Pamela Wallin “made it” when she got her first on-air job at CBC. Some would say she “made it” when she became the first female national news bureau chief in Canada. Some would say she “made it” when she survived colon cancer. Still others would say she’s “made it” now that she’s a Senator.

Ms. Wallin and Gary have something in common, and something very valuable to teach us all about success. They are always setting the bar higher.

You’ve really only truly “made it” when you’ve accomplished what you set out to do and you’re ready to move on to the next step in your life’s journey. You’ve made it when you’re ready to accomplish the next thing on your path. Getting to that point is dependent on saying one word, and saying it often.

Yes.

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As some of you may know, this semester I’m teaching a course at Algonquin College on Web Media. We’re talking about and doing everything from blogging to podcasting to social networking and anything else that falls under the Web 2.0 umbrella.

What I love about this course is that though I was given a basic outline by the college, I’ve pretty much been given free reign to design the course the way I want. This means, not only do I get to come up with all the fun activities we get to do, but I get to hand pick who I’m going to bring in to help me teach the stuff.

Today we were fortunate to welcome my friend, Information Architect extraordinaire Jeff Parks to the class. I knew the students were in for a treat, as Jeff is one of the most passionate speakers I know. Perhaps it’s because if his info architect nature, but the guy can analogize like nobody’s business. And, he’s funny as heck, too.

Needless to say, the class was enthralled for the whole hour he was with us, as he discussed how people disseminate data into real value and how understanding the way people communicate is absolutely vital to succeeding in the online world. Many thanks to Jeff for his invaluable contribution to today’s class.

After Jeff left, we were back to business, and today was the day the students were presenting their second assignment, about online communities. Their task was to work in pairs, and research an online community. They could pick any community they wanted, but they had to explore it thoroughly – what tools were being used, how people were being encouraged to participate, and so on.

Well, not only was I extremely impressed with the quality of the students’ presentations, but I was quite pleased to have been reminded of some interesting facts in the process.

Social media ain’t the only game in town. So here we all are, us social media types, Twittering and blogging away about Twittering and blogging. Meanwhile, out there (I mean, still in the online world – just outside of the social media bubble) there are communities upon communities chock full of wonderful people connecting in amazing ways. It’s true! Go look for yourselves!

Today I heard presentations from my class about online communities that exist around sports (Canadian sports broadcaster TSN is doing some really cool stuff), video games, 3-D animation, local independent music and even candy! Yes, entire online communities exist about CANDY. There are blogs, forums, podcasts, and videos a-plenty in these communities. And most importantly, there are lots and lots and LOTS of people hanging out in these communities. Are they all on Twitter? Well, a few are. Are they all blogging and Facebooking – yep, quite a few, and their numbers are growing. Are they participating in forums and having conversations and connecting? In droves!

Go on, go look! Here’s a task for you – take a walk outside the bubble this week. Do some searches for other stuff that interests you besides social media (or even stuff that doesn’t interest you that much). You will be amazed at what you find. The thing is, the candy lovers, gamers, sports fanatics, and musicians that are out there interacting in these communities? I bet if you asked them, a lot of them wouldn’t even know that what they are doing is social media. They are just out there. Interacting, contributing, and connecting, without even thinking twice about how to do it better or more effectively. We can learn a lot from watching what’s going on out there.

Ooh! More secret sauce. I’m gonna let you in on a little secret. The answers we’re looking for, on how to build better communities and use social media more effectively? They’re already out there. In the candy community, and the sports community, and the gamer community. Go check! You’ll see what I mean.

The thinkers have their place. Now, I’m not trying to say that studying social media, analyzing it like crazy and teaching people how to use social media more effectively is not useful. It’s extremely useful, and not only would I be dead wrong, I’d be putting myself out of a job if I said otherwise.

What I AM saying is that we need to remember that the echo chamber is alive and well, and that once in a while, we need to turn our radar outwards. We need to stop talking to each other, and start talking to the communities themselves. So do you still need to be thinking about social media in these terms? If it’s part of your business, then absolutely. Just don’t forget about the Candy People in the process, or your view will be too narrow and too skewed.

Why I teach. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Teaching, although it is only a smallish part of what I do for a living, is absolutely one of the most rewarding parts of my job. Why? Because I get to talk to people about things I love to talk about, like video and blogging and writing and geeky tech stuff. But what I also love is that every time I go into that classroom, I’m learning too. Thanks to my class today, I gained a new perspective on my work in this space. And for that I’m very grateful!

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The name of the game around this online space is community. Well, it’s some other things too, but mostly it’s about community. Creating them, building them, sharing them, participating in them…if it wasn’t for communities, it wouldn’t be much fun out here on the Interwebz, in my opinion.

Community these days seems to be a tricky thing for some. I feel that the concept of community is way over-analyzed in this online world. People are trying force communities into existence, then keep them afloat through tactics that are sometimes questionable.

Don’t get me wrong – I’m not out to slam those whose job it is to build and manage communities. People like Scott Monty and Keith Burtis are excelling in this area right now. Why? Because they get it. They do it well because they understand how communities work, and how they need to work within them to make them succeed. What I’m saying is that communities can’t be forced.

Whether you want to create, join, lead or participate in a community, there are a few fundamental principles to abide by. I’ve been involved in communities all my life. Perhaps it comes somewhat naturally to me because I grew up in small, isolated towns. Perhaps it’s because of the influence of my parents, who were both active participants and leaders in the communities in which we lived. Perhaps it’s because of my experience working in community television – where it’s ALL about being part of a community. I suspect it’s a combination of these. Regardless, here are a few things I’ve learned about how to succeed with communities. I’d love to hear your tips in the comments too.

You can’t force it to be the way you want it to be. I know this is the third time I’ve said it, but communities cannot be forced. They can be facilitated, to be sure. Most communities begin with an idea. That idea gets spread around to a few people, and they tell two friends, and so on. Before you know it, you have lots of people communicating and collaborating and making things happen. The key is that communities are created by unique, individual people. Those unique voices are what creates the dynamic of the community. Different voices? Different dynamic. You can’t change that. The community evolves into what it will be. You can guide it along the path, but ultimately, you can’t (and shouldn’t) control everything about it.

To lead, you must listen. The brilliant thing about communities is the way the participants shape the community. Communities never work when they are top heavy. When the leaders are the ones dictating the way the community should run, what the community should talk about, and what the community should accomplish, then people lose interest really quickly. A community works when all of the participants have an equal opportunity to have their ideas and opinions heard. This takes listening, and listening closely.

Danny Brown does this exceptionally well. Since he started the 12for12k project, he’s been listening intently to the ideas that people have put forth to him. He’s accepting of people’s opinions and thoughts, and is happy to work with community members to help make their ideas come to fruition. He’s doing more listening than talking. And as a result, he’s doing more leading, and his community is succeeding in amazing ways.

Once a community evolves, it won’t need you as much. Every year at the community TV station, I’d get one or two more new studio shows put on my plate. New shows were a lot of work.  I was responsible for creating them from the ground up – building sets, designing the lighting, finding hosts, creating the elements (opening, titles, etc.), and figuring out the concept and content. I was also in charge of finding my volunteer crew and training them.

At first, I’d be doing everything. I’d be writing the show, coaching the hosts, training volunteers on how to set up the studio, light it and do all the technical production. When I wasn’t training someone to operate cameras or clip on microphones, I was editing all the pre-taped segments. The first show day was usually about an 18-20 hour affair. I would have to answer about 5000 questions a day and fight about the same number of fires. At the same time, I’d also have to make sure I was paying individual attention to my hosts and crew. I’d have to make sure they were feeling happy and challenged and engaged.

Building, designing, creating. Individual attention. Answering questions. Happy, challenged and engaged. Kind of like a community manager, eh?

Each week, we’d do another show. And each week, the community (i.e. the crew) would become a little more independent. Eventually it got to the point where I only had to roll in about an hour before the show went on, and roll out an hour after. My 18 hour days were now 3 or 4 hour days. The community had taken over. I was now just a guide, a facilitator – a listener. I would provide coaching when needed, and fight fires if they occurred (but my community even got good at that!). The show continued to improve, got more viewers, and most importantly, the community was strong and vibrant.

Don’t feel bad if your community doesn’t need you much after a while. It means you’ve done your job. And, hey, it frees you up to go build another community!

There you have it – my tips on building healthy, strong communities. But I want to hear from you. Many of you are experts at this, too. Please add your thoughts to the comments, I’d love to hear what you think.

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One of my Mom’s favourite expressions is “A change is as good as a rest”. It’s a great rule to live by (have I mentioned my Mom is the wisest woman I know?). Moving outside of your typical day to day experiences can be a challenge sometimes, but a fresh approach is almost always a good idea.

The other night I helped a friend of mine move into her new apartment. This new place is a positive change for her and her kids. It’s a beautiful place with a great vibe and a homey feel. As I left her place that night, I could sense that she felt really at peace in her new space. All of the stresses of her day to day life seemed to have just melted away. Change, as scary as it can be sometimes, is often all that is needed to put a new perspective on things.

The Web world is changing at such a fast pace that it sometimes seems overwhelming. That’s why it’s ironic that, when it comes to social networks, it’s easy to get stuck in the same old patterns. We have an almost unlimited number of connections we can make online, yet we do have a tendency to migrate towards those people who are familiar to us. Then we proceed to have the same conversations with those people. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with having close connections and close friends online – quite the contrary. Building a strong relationship based on trust, camaraderie and mutual respect are critically important to the strength of the whole community.

However, it can become unhealthy to stay within the same bubble all the time. After all, isn’t the whole point of social media to connect with many people?

Are you stuck in your ways online? A little too comfy in your social networking circles? Like in offline life, it’s really easy to get stuck in the same crowd, having the same conversations. Once in a while, we all need to branch outside of our comfortable circle of friends and connections sometimes, and have some new experiences.

How does one bust out of their cozy Internet existence? It’s pretty easy, actually. Here are a few tips:

Follow some new people. Seek out some new blogs. There’s lots of ways to do this – you can search topics of interest in your Google Reader, make a visit to Alltop, or ask some people you trust to recommend some good blogs to you. But don’t just read. Leave some comments. Get involved in the community. You’ll be amazed with the new people you can meet by taking this one simple step. If you’re on Twitter, find some interesting new people to follow. Here’s a few giveaways for you: @jeffparks, @Stacerella, @PressReleasePR, and @MackCollier.

Go to a meetup. Just about every major city in North America seems to have meetups now. Sometimes they are called Tweetups (if they are organized through Twitter). It’s a fantastic way to meet new people, and hey, there’s something to be said for doing the live and in person thing. You can seek out meetups in your town by going to http://www.meetup.com/. Don’t have any meetups in your town? Organize one! Also, if you are visiting a new city, check out the meetups that are happening in that city, and get your butt down there! It’s always a blast to meet new folks, but sometimes it’s even more fun to meet people who, until now, you’ve only known online.

Use Twitter Search. I have a friend who is really into soccer. He was asking me yesterday what Twitter is all about, and I told him to go to Twitter Search and poke in “World Cup Soccer” and he’ll see a whole list of people who are talking about his passion. The point is, there are entire communities of people out there who are talking about the things you are interested in. In to aviation? Do a Google Blog Search. Dig on blues music? Search it out on or Twitter Search. Find the communities you want to be a part of. Then get involved. It’s that simple!

So that’s it! Though it’s wonderful to exist in an online world where you know you’re among friends, building comfortable connections and discovering things together, maybe it’s time to break free a little more and see what else is going on around you that might enrich your experience.

What about you? What’s the best new connection you’ve made in the past little while?

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There’s something about a name.

Tonight, I went down to the local Shawarma joint (Mr. Shawarma, for any Ottawa west-enders looking for the best meal in the ‘hood). I am quite a regular there, stopping in probably once or twice a week – it’s my default meal when hubby is working.

The same man is almost always behind the counter; I think he is the owner. His face lights up when I walk in the door, and it’s not just me – he absolutely beams at every customer that comes in. As he prepares your meal, he always asks how you are doing, makes conversation. Not only is the food great, but this man’s personality just makes you want to keep coming back.

One thing is kind of strange though. I have been going there upwards of 3 years now, and I have never known the man’s name. To me, he’s simply “the smiling guy at Mr. Shawarma”. It has never really even occurred to me what his name is or could be.

Tonight, I walked in, and there he was – beaming from behind the counter as always, as if I had just totally made his day by stepping in the door. “Good evening, my friend!!!”, he said. And then I saw it.

He was wearing a name tag. And suddenly things changed.

Until you know someone’s name, they are just a face. A guy behind a counter. A woman crossing the street. A man sitting next to you at a conference. But once you know their name, your relationship with them changes. Once you know someone’s name, you can introduce them to others, file them in your contacts list, and associate them with particular experiences. Once you know their name, you can really start to relate to them.

Until tonight, the guy at the Shawarma shop was another face. But now, I know that his name is Moustafa. He’s no longer “the smiling guy” to me. He’s “smiling Moustafa”. I feel like somehow I know him better, just because I know his name.

What I’ve realized, is that he still does not know my name. I fully intend to rectify that the next time I drop in.

The people that you see and interact with on a day to day basis – the postman, the newspaper carrier, the pizza delivery guy – do you know their names? We all interact with so many people online, know so much about who they are and what they do. But do you know the name of the woman who sells you lottery tickets at the corner store? Do you know your neighbours’ names? And if you don’t – why not?

I’ve realized that I am guilty of this too. So from here on in, I’m going to make a point of not only expanding my network and my community online, but looking around at the people right next to me, and finding out how I can engage them too.

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